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20 Trainers That Make The Fitness Training Industry Look Just Plain Weird
A Personal Training Business Humor Post and Fitness Industry Weirdness Rant by Chris McCombs
Hey there… I hope you're doing awesome… and I hope you're making a killing in your personal training business or boot camp right now.
The fitness training industry is one of the coolest industries around… in my book it's up there with internet marketer, info-marketer, rock star, film director, Chris Hansen busting perverts on Dateline NBC and about a half a dozen other gigs that are real cool… while most people are stuck in some cubicle or factory, fitness trainers are out there in the trenches getting people into shape, helping them to live better lives, be healthier, look better, feel better, have more sex, have more confidence… you name it… you're helping people to have one helluva lot better life.
But it's also one of those gigs where there's some real funky stuff that goes on that can make the rest of the industry look real creepy to an outsider.
In the past, I did a post on dealing with funky and weird personal training clients, and it's still one of my favorite posts of all time… if you haven't read it, DEFINITELY check it out.
In the same spirit, I want to talk about some funky and weird things that go on WITHIN the fitness industry, that kind of gives it a… well, a WEIRD reputation.
So with further ado… here's some common trainer types and situations we could use less of…
1. The trainer who's doing all of his married female clients - this guy's a real knucklehead and is the reason many married men would rather send their wife out to sea with a boat full of sailors than to a personal trainer
2. The trainer who checks himself out in the mirror the whole workout – gym members see this guy with all his strutting and posing… and immediately think that all trainers are vain and self-centered to the umpteenth degree… I agree trainers are a vain breed, but this dude's just a jack ass.
3. The trainer who just goes on and on talking about himself the whole workout - if this guy would just listen to what his clients said a little more often instead of going on and on about himself, he'd probably have three times as many clients
4. The trainer who thinks EVERYONE wants to look all buffed out – example… Mary comes in and wants to lose that last bit of fat on her stomach, if she lost five pounds she'd look great… this dudes solution is to get her to add 20 pounds of muscle, cuz muscle burns fat… Mary will never again hire a trainer and tells all 117 of her friends that personal trainers just make you look buffed like a guy… so lets' just take Pilates and do Jenny Craig.
5. The know-it-all trainer – you can't tell this guy a thing… cuz he already KNOWS
6. The out of shape trainer ( been kinda guilty of this one myself) - when I trained I was only a little out of shape, I had veins running down both arms and you could tell I worked out a lot, but my six-pack wasn't anywhere in sight most of the time… when I transitioned from trainer to strictly business owner, that's when I got out of shape… I'm not gonna bag on this poor bastard cuz I've been there (= … but he ain't no good … let's just leave it at that (=
7. Large corporate gyms hiring just about anyone who will apply as a personal trainer – Have you seen some of the people who get hired as trainers? They couldn't tell a hamstring from a lat or a protein from a carb… it's almost like the gyms just put up 'now hiring' signs and if the person applying has no experience as a janitor they get hired on as a trainer
8. The trainer who charges $10 for a one-on-one hour long workout – this dude devalues the hell out everything he touches and should just go apply at McDonalds… he's got more of a future there
9. The trainer who's always late – One of the biggest reasons people quit their trainer… 20% will never be late, 20% will be late on a regular basis, and 60% once in awhile… make sure to be in the 20% who are never late… well, at least if you like money and building a business
10. The Shark – this bastard is always looking to steal other trainers clients, I've seen quite a few of them… notice how they never seem to get ahead?
11. Mr. Functional – this dude takes his clients through nothing but 60 minute core and functional training workouts… thinking that his clients want to be able to do seal tricks on a stability ball… it never occurred to him that a few might actually want to lose some fat, tone up and look better… but hey, at least if they ever get pulled over for drunk driving they'll pass with flying colors.
12. Thomas Walk-it-Off – client just blew a hernia… this guy has one reaction to all injuries – "walk it off"
13. The trainer who's been training for two years and still only has four clients - believe it or not this makes up a HUGE portion of the industry… this guys always complaining about the economy.
14. The Part-Time Psychotherapist Trainer – this dude loves to hand out marital advice to his clients… often times you'll find this guy has the same agenda as #1 on this list because he's often the SAME DUDE
15. The Rep-Counter - "one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten… good! now lets do some one legged stability ball core twisters… one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten"
16. Suzie The Forehead Wiper - this trainer spends all her time fetching towels, two pound dumbbells, water and wiping the sweat off her clients foreheads… she is a SERVANT, not a fitness trainer
17. The Pervo Trainer - since he can no longer be within 500 yards of school and obviously cannot continue his teaching career, he is now a personal trainer and he's creeping out every female in the gym… he stares them up and down with a look that scares the living sh*t of em'
18. The NEEDY Trainer - has four clients and needs more desperately… when people come in to do a trial workout they can feel his desperation just like the ladies can feel the desperation of the guy who hasn't been with a female since 1992… and desperation is the probably the biggest 'client repellent' known to man
19. Jonny 82 Letters after his name – he has 27 certifications… and is PROUD of it, he wears them like a badge of awesomeness… but this guy is broke, he's desperate and needy for clients just like good ole #18, he's often time a purely functional trainer like #11… helping people to contract their abs better while they balance on one foot… and he's also a #5… a total know-it-all… he's best left alone in the corner so he can help his clients touch their finger to their nose while standing on one foot squeezing their glutes… most every gym has a trainer like this and they're sheer comedy.
20. Mr. Boring - no energy… he's the opposite of a Steve Hochman… he's bored, his clients are bored… and he's got about as much chance of building a slammin' business as Mr. Pervo has attracting the ladies.
*** After reading the comments below a few more sprung to mind…
21. Mr. Forced Rep – Like something out of a 1980's Flex magazine, this dude thinks every client needs forced reps on every set.
22. Mr. Crazy Form – I can't tell what he's got his clients doing half the time, I just know it ain't safe… he's teaching semi-complex powerlifts while having never done one in his life… stiff legged deadlifts with the knee's totally locked, back rounded and toes pointing out to the sides at about a 45 degree angle… bench presses with the crazy bounce and rounded shoulders… squats that look more like a really bad 'good morning' ( again, with a horribly rounded back)… and some other crazy exercises that he must've made up… these 'custom' exercises of his won't do much more than blow out the joints and cause some pretty gnarly injuries… this bafoon is one of the most common offenders.
Well, there ya have it… I'm sure I left a few off the list… in the comment section below I'd love to hear about any that you know of that I forgot to mention… or your personal experience with any of the ones I listed above.
If you'd like to avoid being on of the trainers, I recommend this post How To Be a Bad Ass
And if you liked this post, you'll probably LOVE this one Dealing with Funky and Weird Fitness Training Clients
Comments on 20 Trainers That Make The Fitness Training Industry Look Just Plain Weird
Great post, Chris. Kinda funny 'cause I've seen many of them myself..haha..I was able to come up with a mental description of each one that you mentioned. See you in Orlando!
-Dan
OMG! Best post ever!
1)The trainer that is more scared in the assessment room than a 400 pound first time gym goer at Equinox in Chelsea. They are the one whos voice cracks with nervousness and make the person they are doing the assessment on feel more insecure and anxious about being assessed.
2)The trainer that never played sports or did anything physical until he decided to get a trainer certification and bull shits everything that comes out of his mouth about fitness. He usually does 3 sets of 15 every workout with all of his clients and doesn't understand anatomy, physiology or anything that was in his cert. He is another trainer that doesn't understand why he has 4 clients.
3)The guy who has been training since the early 1980's and all he knows is what Arnold did. He stuck in the eighties training style and will not listen and couldnt retain even if he wanted to, th updated information about exercise science. He is usually # 4 too.
I have seen them all. The list of 20 was histerical!
Chris, Thats the funniest damn stuff I've ever read!! So true too! haha!
HA HA!!!! Loved it!!! Where i used to work before i went solo, (obviously because i wasn't on this list and knew i could actually make money out there), was a corporate gym who hired anyone…even a dietician who had her training cert but had never trained in their life…and every single person on this list worked there!!!
So true!
Duuuuuude,
Sometimes I dress up as "Creepy trainer Guy".
Lots of my clients have had trainers before, so I take on the stereotype and wear bike shorts, loose tank top, and weight belt.
I sit behind my female clients on the seated row, stand too close to everyone, and play up the perviness.
They love the joke and it sets my team apart from creepy big box gym trainers.
(Of course, I make my guys peacock PUA style, but that's another post….)
Gracias amigo!
~ Luke
Dude I love it..can't stop laughing
Geez, guess I can't give Sarah those tickets for the sail boat tour. =P
Sh*t I'm guilty of the worst one in the list……
How about the cell phone trainer with blue tooth in his ear. And the nerves to answer the phone while training a client!!!!
Very funny but sadly true. I will add the steroid junkie and the "It works for me so it should work for everyone else" trainer to the mix. Great post, keep them coming!
BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! I love it! Funny shit Chris! I am soooo thankful that I do not fall into any one of these categories. I'm sure I could be a little more enthusiastic, have a little bit more energy. I'm no Steve Hochman but neither I nor my workouts will bore you, that's for damm sure! And I love the one that Ian put up about the trainer who never played sports and is just not sports or fitness minded in any way, those jerks are just doing it for the money…sucks for them cuz they're probably working at a chain gym for "The Man" not really making good money.
I still am loving the post about how to be a bad-ass! It goes along with what I'm starting to write about in my book, based on my life theory of "No More Bullshit".
Keep it up Chris!
Doug Seamans
PRIDE Conditioning
http://www.prideconditioning.com
I was laughing so much and mentally going through all the Trainers I know and giving them there numbers!!! its a fun game
Unfortunately…you are so on target Chris. Very very funny!!
ahhaha!!! oh in canada there is a very common trainer i've run into in quite a few of the gyms around my hometown. Its the guy who goes out and parties all night doing hard drugs and drinking his face off, then comes in still high and hungover but jacked up on caffeine and trains all his bar star clientelle, and every chance he gets he nips home to take more hits off his bong.. and then picks up a few clients here and there for the night. Oh and while hes out he slimes his way all over girls handing out his biz cards and invites them in for a free session then weasles them out of their money, only to give them the same cookie cutter impossible workout he gives to all his clients. true story, pretty sick huh!
Man that is a great post… I was reading it just waiting to see if any one of them would be me and..NOPE! I'm stoked! (pats self on back!)
I got one for you…How about the Bad B.O. Trainer!!! GROSS! Or the trainer with no sense of style that shows up to the gym in an old ripped up t-shirt, stained up sweats and combat boots! I'd post a pic of the guy I'm referring to, but I don't want to get sued! lol.
JJ Brawley
San Diego Personal Trainer
Inner City Boot Camp Program Coordinator
San Diego's Premier Boot Camp
http://www.innercitybootcamp.com
Love it Chris! I've had so many clients who have had horrible experiences in the past with "personal trainers." Luckily, once they deal with quality trainers they know better and spread the word like wildfire!
Stephen Boyce
http://www.BoyceFitness.com
Here in philadelphia we have a HUGE problem with people charging almost nothing for training.
One guy who claims to have 31 certifications and a PhD is charging 35$ for IN Home training! Good God.
In a town where the normal rate for in-home was 60 – 80 (depending on the area) we now have to compete with guys doing 35 or 40.
Yo Chris
where is clipboard dude?
Hope it's ok to post links…thought this was rather high-larrious, as mister Burns would say…
http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/bts/1408422400.html
No I do not know this man
I do apoligize, but we don't need anyone to ruin the fitness industry.
Dime
The rep-counter drives me crazy. Dontget me wrong, its good to now the count and maybe let them now the last couple, but every rep…..
LOVE IT! TOO TRUE! but what about the:
I'M SUCH A BADASS BALLBREAKER TOO COOL TO SAY HELLO TO MY CO-WORKERS,AND ANYONE ELSE WHO ISN'T PAYING ME, TRAINER…the guy
that makes his clients chase HIM around the gym while he barks out
commands and claps his hands, when he's not talking on the phone.
or holding a shake….and pays NO attention to form whatsoever-
until his clients finally quit due to injury or when most people
that they know start wondering aloud why they have a build like an
oven-stuffer roaster chicken…
great shit Chris McCombs Awesome. I know ive been behaving like a Mr.Know it all. I got to get off my high horse and get to work. i need to quit being a little bitch.
I need to put people to Work and tell them to quit "F"n around and do "What needs to be done". Ive been too Nice to people "pretending like everything is Okay when it is not okay". No more excuses.
Dude so on the mark. I wrote a similiar article on my webpage and newsletter about the trainers I see in various gyms that have their clients perform for the rest of the members. They have them execute exercises beyond the clients scope and risk injury so they can attract business. I have had experience with all the trainers above, and more recently with someone who told me her competitive and famous trainer(so she says) is charging her $20 an hour to train her. I wished her the best of luck and showed her the door. When are people going to realize that a $20 an hour trainer is just that? Do they go to the cheapest surgeon they can find or the best?
All the diplomas and certs in the world cannot make up for a lack of personality. SOme of these trainers who are by the book and cannot think outside the lines, are even harder to combat than the $20 an hour trainer. Get results for your clients, know what you are talking about when you open your mouth and make sure they know that you are there for them. I guarantee your business will thrive if not on referrals alone
Dude so on the mark. I wrote a similiar article on my webpage and newsletter about the trainers I see in various gyms that have their clients perform for the rest of the members. They have them execute exercises beyond the clients scope and risk injury so they can attract business. I have had experience with all the trainers above, and more recently with someone who told me her competitive and famous trainer(so she says) is charging her $20 an hour to train her. I wished her the best of luck and showed her the door. When are people going to realize that a $20 an hour trainer is just that? Do they go to the cheapest surgeon they can find or the best?
All the diplomas and certs in the world cannot make up for a lack of personality. SOme of these trainers who are by the book and cannot think outside the lines, are even harder to combat than the $20 an hour trainer. Get results for your clients, know what you are talking about when you open your mouth and make sure they know that you are there for them. I guarantee your business will thrive if not on referrals alone
Sorry, forgot to add great post! Can't wait to see your next post!
Daaaaaamn Chris that shizza was funny baby!!!
I have memories of seeing many people like what you described above….I still see them today!
Hey Chris
I had a great laugh when I read this post. And I can relate to almost everyone of the trainers you mentioned.
I like to add one type of trainer that you had probably left out. I remembered the days when I was a club trainer and I saw a fellow colleague who happened to be a competing bodybuilder. He's a know-it-all combined with strutting and posing his things in front of the mirror type of personal trainer. Well, I called him Mr Ego trainer. He likes to load the weight up to the max like 100-120kg (220lb-244lb) and demonstrate to his clients how to do a certain exercise such as squats. He did it in front of the mirror looking at himself and was doing it even in front of small tiny clients. To me, that's show off and I mean you can show your clients how to do an exercise without heavy weights.
Cheers
TC
you forgot someone
…the obnoxious trainer who wants their clients to gain lean muscles by taking in Drugs…I mean, they must've planned to enter the fitness training business to sell more of their drugs
AWESOME!
I have encountered ALL of the above over the years! I wanna add another! How about the "Three-Ring Circus Crazy Trainer Lady?"
This chick at the last gym I worked for had NO CLUE. She was guilty of many of the above offenses…she charged like $10 a session and would brag about it…corner my clients in the locker room & tell them they were paying too much, etc. She trained oblivious mostly-middle-aged women in groups of 3-6 and it really was like a three-ring circus.
Let me paint a picture for you…
She would set up granny over in the corner on a BOSU doing wacky barbell clean & presses, yell at another client on the opposite side of the HUGE weight room, then let granny get going with TERRIBLE form, run over to set up another eternally-flabby-because-she-has-no-clue client to do some exercise she saw me doing with an advanced client, etc etc…this went on for an hour, and provided much entertainment for my clients as well as myself. Obviously, she was a HUGE liability and if she hasn't injured a client by this point, i'd really be surprised. She also had a habit of no-showing clients and calling in for lame-ass reasons.
The gym manager WOULD NOT fire her…I know, I know…ridiculous.
Another label I would schlap on this "trainer" would be "the threatened by more-qualified trainers trainer". After initially meeting me and saying she had heard a lot about me, yadda yadda yadda, she would badmouth me behind my back and it was obvious she was insecure.
I kinda miss the good ol' days of working for a gym…lol…
Oh Chris!
Gr8 blog post, as usual.
All of these irritate me, but you definetly got your point across. IT is such a shame of how these peeps permeate our industry!
I think my least favorite is the Rep Counter….Oh….that one just kills me! Like how boring can you really be? And still get paid?!?!?!
That was awsome….
Immediately after I read each one, I could picture a trainer that I knew, and who is no longer in the business!!
One of my least favorite (because it takes so much convincing to have people try working with a trainer again) – the trainer who makes their 50-year old, never worked out before client do walking lunges across the gym and other exercises that client has absolutely no business doing.
They think making their brand-new client not be able to walk for a week is the sign of a "good workout."
Pisses me off just thinking about it.
Dude you just described 80% of the trainers at my gym.
But amazing they are doing quite well.
Hilarious…but it's good as it makes the awesome trainers easier to stand out from the rest!
hahaha that's awesome, i think i have most of this going on at my gym. I bet you agree with me also, you see it daily. Awesome post man!
Chris,
Very Funny…yet soooo true. No wonder people look at our profession as a joke. I can see why the Curves franchise thrives
LMAO Gr8 post bro. Supreme KickASS AweSOME!!!
Hope you don't mind if I reposted the link to
it on facebook.
I read this before, but after seeing it again it has motivated me to write an article What to Avoid in a Knoxville Personal Trainer!
Thanks!
Chris and Friends,
So I'm totally #15. Whats something I can do to make this issue better? I wasn't really aware that it wasn't good but I know there is alway room for improvement. I'm really looking forward to perfecting my people relation and what makes the experience great for them.
Thanks,
Daniel
Hey Daniel, awareness is the first step… then just stop doing… there's a video by hochman somewhere on this blog about raising your energy… it's under the boot camp marketing posts… you might be able to get a few tips from there
I appreciate your honesty
Oh I can't believe I can identify those problems in my own country. I always have this misconception that the trainers in the US is really professional. I guess it's the human nature. Let me add another point. There are those trainers that just would not journalized clients' results and progress..when being asked for it..they just shove the matter aside.. Or those that promised a specific session price then they make an increment without your consent..how unethical..
This is my first comment on your blog but I had to comment on this… after I stopped laughing! I use to feel bad for these guys but in actuality they made it a lot easier for me to succeed. The funny thing is that these guys (and gals) never listen when you try to give advice. The fact that I had 50 clients and 1 certification and they had 10 certification and 3 clients should clue them in… oh well. You gotta put one more on the list. The STEALER: this trainer sees the cool stuff you're doing with your clients and steals every move. He spends half the time watching you out of the corner of his eye.
PS one of my clients is opening up her own gym, I sent her a link to your blog and told her to read every post before she thinks about moving forward… keep up the good work!
I've seen EVERY ONE of these trainers!
Oh my god!! Hilarious, this is AWESOME ha.. im so stealing this and sending this link to my friends!!!!!!!! haha, chris your sense of humour is totally awesome and TOTALLY CORRECT!..
ive seen them all
This is funny as heck and brilliant! Trainers should absolutely strive and aspire to be unlike any of the (22) types of trainers listed.
Hilarious AND accurate. Well done CHRIS!
Awesome Chris, I remember when we used to point out these types of trainers at the gym..
Funny, and I agree that quite a few trainers in our industry leave a lot to be desired.
This is the truth right here. You get a lot of this shit.
Hey Chris, just wanted to say thanks much for your info.
Just from reading your site alone, I am comfortable training from getting all the clients I need in my inbox in the morning from being on the first page of Google. I got my site to be on the first page for the phrases pittsburgh personal trainer and personal trainer pittsburgh just from your free blogs alone and not much work on my part.
My blog also pulls in people locally and I have to do NO other marketing work to be comfortable with my training business.
Thanks bruh
Hey thanks Chuck, super cool of you for letting me know