A Fitness Sales Guest Post by Adam Toohey
This is a guest post from my friend Adam Toohey… I’ll let Adam take it from here…
Not so long ago Chris put up a post on listening to your customers People (including you) need to feel connected to something or someone and by listening, intently and really being present, you can give this gift to your clients every day.
“We have 2 ears and 1 mouth therefore we can listen twice as much as we speak” – Epictetus
Ask yourself this question… What else can I do to ensure I really connect with my client?
( Hint - The secret lies in the answer…. )
But before I go there… let me share a brief story
A new restaurant had opened up in Melbourne recently and it was said to be THE BEST Steak House Restaurant in the whole city. Local and International celebs were known to dine there and getting a table on any given night is pretty tough. Not one to be discouraged I called the restaurant in advance just to see what my chances were. “Sorry Sir, we are totally booked this evening”
I’ll admit I had left it a bit late (I had a date that night and figured the restaurant would impress) and so was as we say in Australia I was “shit outta luck”
I had promised the girl a dinner at this place and I wasn’t to be denied… so we went to that very restaurant anyway knowing it was fully booked.
Leaving my friend at the front (to work my magic) I strode in towards the front of house and was presented with a charming and somewhat stressed staff member.
“I wondered if you could help me”. “Certainly Sir”.
“I called earlier and spoke to your manager who informed me you were fully booked tonight’s dinner, and I can see that you are really busy, but I wondered if there was any chance of an early seating now for two… We only need about an hour”.
A few minutes later I walked with a certain swagger to grab my date and we were shown to our seats.
Needless to say she was blown away… (Oh and we were given 2 hours)
So was it just coincidence, or was it something more?
Take a look at the structure of my initial statement to the front of house server… and read between the lines.
I ASKED for help… and the server had AGREED.
So a small request was granted (anyone read Influence?)
I then dropped the manager’s name as a form of social proof/being seemingly connected.
I positioned myself as knowing and understanding the stress the server was under and acknowledged that the restaurant was indeed busy.
I then made my next small request; a table for 2.
Backing this up with “early seating” and “only needing an hour”
I had spoken their language and if there was any way they were able to squeeze us in for the early booking they would surely do it. And they did.
I also matched the server’s body language, voice qualities and facial expressions to ensure that from the very outset I was in rapport with him and was able to easily enter his world thus he felt significant and heard.
The steak was phenomenal by the way and the lobster ravioli appetizer was incredible.
Maybe you’re thinking that’s great Adam but what’s The Secret?
Matching and Mirroring!
What do I mean by that?
If you have looked into NLP at all you will know what I am talking about.
Matching and Mirroring is a communication technique that yields amazing power and the best part about it… It’s EASY to do and done properly NO ONE will know you are doing it.
In fact, you already do it every day with those people you have a strong rapport with.
It’s taking someone’s words, tonality and or body language and matching them (or mirroring)
If a client tells you they want “a Flat Stomach” and you say “Great you’ll have a Six Pack in no time” you’re not matching them.
A client leaves you a message about your Boot Camp and so you call them back… only to find what sounds like a dead person on the other end of the line… but you proceed to rave about your camp in a high volume, energetic voice… you haven’t mirrored them. (p.s. they won’t sign up)
OR (and this IS the most powerful) you are sitting through a consultation with a client and while they are leaning in towards you with their hands on their knees sharing their story, you are sitting back with your arms folded. You’re not matching OR mirroring them. You are communicating with them ineffectively and as a result are not really connecting with them.
Some folks see MnM as manipulation… in reality it’s putting yourself in the position of the client be it through words, tonality, pitch, volume, body language etc. in order to understand and appreciate their world more effectively.
If I say “That’s Awesome” enthusiastically and you agree but say “yeah that looks ok” in the back of my mind somewhere I’m going to think “What the hell is wrong with this Bloke/Sheila” and I won’t know it consciously but I’ll have this feeling that something isn’t quite right.
Here’s what you can match or mirror with anyone you encounter
- Breath
- Words
- Tonality (voice)
- Pitch (voice)
- Eye movements
- Facial Expressions
- Body Position
- Body Posture
- Body language in general
- Timbre (voice)
- Speed/Pace (voice)
- Voice Expressions
- Accent (ONLY if you’re really good at it otherwise it may be insulting. Aussie’s won’t care they’ll just think you’re a dropkick)
- Mood (feeling)
- Energy Level (insert Steve Hochman)
And here’s the kicker… let’s say you are in a meeting with 2 people… guess what? You can match both of them at the same time thereby creating rapport with both of them.
So what does all this mean to you and your business?
Using these techniques is the real secret to effective communication and will have you dominate rapport in almost any situation if you use it correctly. It’s a real Jedi mind trick because you are connecting with your client/prospect or potential JV partner at an unconscious level. That part of their brain that makes their heart beat 100,000 times a day without them noticing.
And remember… you already do it now with those closest to you. Now you can do it with anybody.
Adam Toohey is a Certified NLP Practitioner and Etobicoke Personal Trainer , he also owns and operates Toronto Fit Body Bootcamp
Would love to hear your comments about this post…
Great stuff, Adam!
One of my favorite techniques is to say, "I understand."
Lots of women are scared that training will make them too muscular. If you're not speaking their language, you'll tell them that that's nearly impossible, that even men have to work their balls off and eat like horses to gain mass, blah blah blah.
What they hear is you shutting them down.
Instead, say "I understand Mrs. Krensky. What you think is too muscular and what I think is too muscular may be 2 different things. When you come in next time please bring me a picture of a girl who is too muscular and one with your ideal body. Then I'll know and make sure it doesn't happen."
That little script does 2 things:
1) It shows that I understand her concerns
2) It is a trial close. She agreed to come in again after the consultation.
Stay frosty guys!
Luke… dude
That's awesome… i'll give that a go and you are spot on
You need to see what she thinks as too muscular cuz they could be very different pictures to what you are imagining
Keep killin it mate
AT
Great post bro!
I've noticed its the trainers who use this most effectively who are most successful in their businesses.
Keep up the great work!
Adam, that's a great tip – I would suggest that it's always worth communicating with people in a way that maximizes the clarity of the message (unless of course you have a reason for deliberately doing otherwise). So mirroring and matching should be an all time rather than a special event thing.
However – it should alos be noted that restaurants have only so many tables and chairs – there is a finite number of people that they can serve and you might use all your best people skills and still find you get told "Sorry but we are full"
All the best.
Robert.
Hey Adam!
Hope you're killing it in Canada with your boot camp! Thanks for sharing the great communication tips. I used to think the mirroring was a bunch of crap but it works.
Cheers!
TC
Hey Adam,
Awesome post mate and I couldn't agree more with all of the NLP techniques.
I am a qualified NLP Practitioner and you have hit the nail on the head, especially when it comes to sales for all you trainers out there.
As much as you can match and mirror people over the phone and even via email ( yes if you look at the way they write – how long the email is etc will tell you how detailed they want the information back to them). If they write a short brief email do the same in return, also check the predicates (words) that they speak in the email or phone, they will give you the main sense that they work out and then you can write or talk to match ( visual, auditory, kinasethic, Olfactory, Gustatory).
For sales I believe it is best to get the client in front of you where possible, so you have the opportunity to match & mirror them, this will give you a higher chance to build instant rapport with them. 55% of of rapport is through physiology alone ( posture, gesture, breathing, facial expressions & blinking).
Scottie the Aussie Fitness Expert
Great article Adam – I love the Australian accent.
Define dropkick please =)
And that is an incredible way to handle the "too bulky" thing Luke.
Thats great stuff I will try it in my next consultation. Thanks for the tip.
Excellent information!Thank you for that:)
Love it! It makes perfect sense.When meeting people for the first time they always seem to be a little nervous. With that technique, after the first couple of minutes the nervousness is gone and it's just as if we've known each other forever.
Great information and good stuff to be aware of. I'm going to pay close attention to my tone of voice, pitch, and body language next time I'm on the phone or meeting with a potential client. It's those little things that make such a big difference, so thank you for reminding us!
Thanks Adam. THIS is the type of information we should be learning in school.
Dr. George
Adam, You are everywhere! Great info, insight.
Great post Adam! I have been reading Influence and I understand what you mean!
I will be sending this link to all of our personal trainers to help them remember some of the key points!
Talk to you soon,
Nikki
AWESOME POST ADAM! A lot of the time when I get really busy I forget to do things like this which make all of the difference when interacting with clients or just everyone I come into contact with.
Thanks for breaking things down and explaining it all thoroughly. I'm definitely going to be applying these techniques in the rest of my training sessions today and over the next few days since I have some very important networking to do.
This post couldn't have come at a better time!
Thanks mate,
Brandon
@Robert Hutton.. totally agree with you there mate. Without a doubt it ought to be a part of every interaction you have… and it can be with practice. Doing it enough then becomes habit and so what you find is you are able to respond to a client or whomever in a way that makes them feel great and feel comfortable if they didn't otherwise.
Also true the servers have a limited number of seating.. again it may have been a little coincidence but it's also just one of soo many examples as some ppl have shared here.
All the best
AT
@Christian .. cheers bro
I trust when you gettin to Canada?
@Dr. George YES!!! I couldn't agree more. These skills are so critical and none (at least that I am aware of) is taught in school. I know it will be something I'll be passing on to my kids when the time arrives.
Hoffmaster!
Dropkick is an aussie way of sayin Jackass… although the tone of JA is a little firmer.. perhaps a knucklehead?
Thanks for the good words
@ Nikki.. awesome! I hope they get as much value out of it.
Thanks guys and girls for the good words.. and Becky you are so right… those little things make such a difference in every area of your business. The 1 percenters as well call em in OZ
Adam,
Great post. Very good information. I am intrigued to learn more.
Thanks
Brian
Hey Brandon,
Love that enthusiasm mate.. be sure to let me know how you go with it all…
Aussie Scottie… Would love to connect with you mate… One thing I'm missin over here in Toronto is a little Aussieness.. congrats again on the awards..
@Brian.. Thanks mate and be sure to keep updated here.. more to come
AT
Solid advice and something I have always tried to do, pick up on body language and speech and try to fit in. I'm a big guy and some people say a little scary, this has helped me throughout my life. Good advice to all.
Doug Seamans
PRIDE Conditioning
http://www.prideconditioning.com
Fantastic info. This is great advice. Stuff most learned during mock college interviews but may have forgotten
Adam, you're on the money big fella. Oh maybe you should have called the drop-kick a wanker and totally confused everyone.
Stay aussie champ and don't let the maple leaf penetrate.
Oi, Oi, Oi.
'Aussie Mick'